


Not Distance

by Jay_Washington



Series: Rewrite the Stars Oneshots [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, First Kiss, Force Bond (Star Wars), Light Angst, POV Alternating, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-25
Updated: 2018-01-25
Packaged: 2019-03-09 06:47:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13475955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jay_Washington/pseuds/Jay_Washington
Summary: Not long after the events of The Last Jedi, Rey finds herself calling on an unexpected friend.





	Not Distance

_Kylo Ren._

She called out his name in the silence around her like he would actually hear, like he would actually care. She wasn't entirely sure how their bond worked, but she hoped that it would be enough just to call his name.

 _Ren_. She tried again after several moments of stillness had gone by. She hadn't attempted to speak to him since she'd left with the Resistance three days ago, since she'd closed the door on him. She hadn't even planned on speaking to him again.

And yet, here she was, alone in the corridor of a random part of the ship, desperate to fill the silence with  _someone_. She would've gone to Finn, but he spent his days mostly concerned with Rose, who had yet to wake from her injuries. And even if he had been available, she wasn't sure he'd understand what she was feeling.

 _She_  wasn't even sure what she was feeling. But she knew that there was one person who always seemed to understand. As she walked through the hallway, she tried one last time to call to him.  _Ben_.

 _Rey_.

She felt his presence materialize behind her. "What do you want?" His voice was pained, stiff.

"It's not like I called you here," she lied. "Why, what do  _you_  want?"

Kylo knew there were two possible answers: her, back with him, or some form of absolution. As he followed her, he wondered if he wanted both. "I want you to come back," he finally decided.

She snorted and turned toward him. "Back? What makes you think—" The rest of her sentence left as her attention was caught by the full view of his lower torso. "Why are you  _always_  without a shirt?"

He frowned at her and held up his long shirt. "I was getting dressed, actually."

Rey felt her face heat up as she stared at him, watched his muscles flex as he pulled it over his shoulders. Not wanting him to watch her discomfort, she turned away from him.

He tried to peer into her face, to no avail. "Are you serious? Have you forgotten you've seen me in less?"

Oh, no, she definitely remembered. Despite how hard she'd tried, she couldn't seem to forget the sight of his broad shoulders, or his chest, powerfully built and muscular from all his years of training. And it was those memories now that made her react this way.

"Just…zip up," she ordered, still trying to avoid staring at the opening. She didn't trust the bond not to betray her feelings if she looked.

"You still think you can resist it," he mused as she started to walk again.

For a moment, Rey thought he was talking about her refusal to look at him undressed. Then, remembering their recent conversation, she said, "Yes. It's not hard, you know. The distance between us was already there—all I had to do was feel it."

* * *

Kylo raised an eyebrow. "Distance? Is that what you think is between us right now?"

"Well, what would you call it?"

For the longest time, he didn't say anything. Then, finally, he said, "Not distance."

She could always count on him to be dramatic. "No, I suppose you wouldn't call it that," she said. "Destiny, then? Or some other nonsense word like that?"

"It's not nonsense," he whispered.

Rey hid behind a corner as a group of Resistance fighters rushed past her, allowing the silence between them to build. "Why do you even want me to join you? I'm nobody, remember?"

"You're nothing," he agreed, reaffirming her greatest fears. Then, again, "Nothing."

"Yes, thank you for saying that again," Rey said bitterly. She forced her head down as she walked, ashamed of the tears she felt brimming in her eyes. The only thing worse than hearing this from him would be if he saw her cry about it.

He closed the distance between them and blocked her path. When she didn't immediately look at him, he bent down to catch her eyes. When they finally rose to meet his, Kylo lost his words and himself.

Suddenly he was back in the forest with her, staring into her eyes, as she'd found the Force. That was the first time Kylo had realized he wanted nothing more than to be by this girl's side. His first inclination had been to be with her as a teacher, but as her gaze flickered down to his mouth, he knew he'd been wrong. To be only her teacher would never be enough.

Succeed or fail—and he would, of course, succeed with Rey—he wanted to be with her.

* * *

"But not to me, remember? You've always been somebody to me, Rey."

Her breath hitched in her chest. She had no place in this story, no status in this universe. She'd suspected that, but had always hoped as she'd moved from mentor to mentor—Han Solo and then Luke—that she'd find  _somewhere_  to call her home. And now, here he was, telling her that she belonged with him.  _To_  him. To Kylo Ren.

She was less afraid of the idea than she was the realization that she actually  _wanted_  that, to belong to him.  _But not to Kylo Ren_ , she thought as she looked into his face, broken by the physical scar she'd given him and the emotional ones she hadn't. No, she didn't belong to Kylo Ren, but—"Ben."

She didn't have to be alone anymore. The Force had chosen her.  _Ben_  had chosen her. And now, Rey had the chance to show him that she'd chosen him back.

He took a step toward her and reached out with his gloved hand. But she didn't want to feel the coolness of his glove; she wanted to feel  _him_ , wanted to feel his warmth. She shouldered her way past him.

"Do I have to say please again?" There was something hard in his voice that hadn't been there before.

It had been a mistake to call him. She shook her head, trying to clear it as she hurried to her room. She'd shut the door on him once—she could do it again.

"Where are you  _going_ ," he asked, exasperated.

"Anywhere." She reached her room and quickly shut the door on him, willing their connection to fade away.

Still, she felt his presence behind her. "I still don't understand why you're trying to run away from me, from all of this." His brow was furrowed together in confusion.

Her own confusion came out in a breathy laugh. "You're still trying to convince me to rule the galaxy with you. That's not what I want!"

"I'm offering you the chance to  _mean_  something to this story," he said, coming closer to her with every word. "Like you mean something to me."

She glared at him like she was about to punch him, but then she did something that surprised him even more. She kissed him.

* * *

He knew that he was home when her lips touched his. There were parsecs between them, he knew, but the Force, this connection made her touch feel so real. He sighed into her, into the desires he'd always felt but had yet to act on. Until now.

Rey was warm, so warm. In the places she tugged at him—his hair, the front of his cloak—the places where her fire met his ice, Kylo felt his passions sizzle with their electricity. It was messy and graceless. He shuffled even closer to deepen it. Every inch of him craved her, even more so when she broke off the kiss.

He'd thought a kiss would leave him satisfied, but now he knew that he could never have enough. The secret was out—he wanted  _her_ —and he wasn't ready to try to hide it again. He caught her right hand as it slid down his chest and pressed gentle kisses into it.

"Come with me," he murmured against her wrist, knowing the answer would be no. He shook as he clung to her. "Please."

After a moment, however, she said, "Come with  _me,_  instead." She reached up with her other hand and cupped the side of his face, her soft fingers ghosting over the outline of his scar. "We can still bring a new order to the galaxy, rewrite the stars if we wanted to. We can set it  _free_ , Ben."

His chest tightened with fear. "Now  _you're_  the one trying to turn me. But I've already been down the path you're following, Rey—it doesn't work. The vision you had of turning me is impossible."

"It's not," she said decidedly. "It may feel like it, but it's not."

"Rey, if we each go down these paths, I won't be able to stop fate from pulling you out of my reach." He leaned into her hand. "I don't want that.  _Please_  tell me you don't want that, too."

"I don't," she promised. "It wasn't an accident, me finding you. I see that now."

His eyes fell to the floor as he stepped away from her. She still didn't see it— _couldn't_  see it.

"I lied to you earlier. I  _did_  call you here."

Kylo's gaze snapped back up. "Why?"

"I didn't want to admit it, but you're the only one who really seems to understand me. You're the only one I feel like I can just be Rey."

She was so close to seeing it, seeing the truth he kept trying to tell her. "That's how I feel. But we can only be you and me  _here_ , Rey. If you go outside right now, you'd see the truth."

He swallowed, willing himself to speak the truth before his courage ended, before the connection was lost. "Outside, our love is hopeless. If we stay in the paths they've made for us, they'll keep us apart."

Rey shook her head. "No, they won't. Whether they like it or not, you're here in my heart, Ben. It's already too late for them to stop us. That's why you should come with me."

Rey stretched her hand out to him and Kylo stared at it hesitantly. Suddenly, he could feel the distance between them. He wanted to go with her. But if he left with her, what would become of him then?

"Join me," she said. "Please."

Kylo raised his eyes to meet hers. "I can't." And with that, the connection dissolved, her form shimmering in front of him until it ultimately vanished into darkness.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the second story that I've written for "Rewrite the Stars" from "The Greatest Showman." Please don't forget to review!


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